So That

I’m just a little off but that turns your heart on. I dance to my own beat and you begin to follow. Love is to be sought after with reckless abandon but it shouldn’t be taken lightly. For “once” let me be the “upon a time” and I swear you’ll be my “happy ever after”. Come closer so that my heartache is forced farther. Take my hand so I can finally fall…
Hold me to help me let go. Whisper your dreams and I will shout your talents to the world. Look me in the eye so that I can’t even choose to look down. Kiss me one more time so that I’ll know your my last and only. Dance with me so that fighting is easily ended. Move with me so settling down will be a long awaited joy. Chase the stars with me so that we can see our futures through the One who created the stars. Respect me so that Ill learn my true worth through confidence and security. Let me fall asleep I your arms so that I can wake up with the greatest view. Calm me to make me outgoing. Quietly compromise your quirks with me so that we’ll be able to handle each others oddities. Love me for who I am so that I can love who you are becoming even more.
Play music, it’ll drown out the silence of the lonely. Organize your heart so that Im not your only love, leave room for family. Fall to your knees in desperation to the creator so that I can see how truly strong you are.
Marry me so that Ill never forget how lucky I am.


You Never Asked, But Here Is The Script To “Us”

Forgive me if the following is a bit disheveled. I just want you to know how I feel.

You inspired some of my greatest work, there is no doubt that you were my muse. It was you who breathed the melody I tried to write words to in hopes of a perfect song. I have noticed though, that you are not worth my words. You never were. It is sad, I see now that those words were wasted. They were wasted on a little boy who could not see two feet in front of himself. As I noticed this, I began to hang the blame on myself. This started by looking in the mirror and forgetting who I was. I questioned my traits, characteristics and looks. This is a side effect that no one should cause. From this I can see that you were a total waste. You became my first lost cause today. You played with my heart and the worst part is, I don’t think you even cared. You sat in your grey world and this burst of sunlight went unseen. Your eyes were fixed and your head unturned. What a waste, these lovely words were spent to buy empty love. How could you see the rain and yet still turn to the fire? Being caught up in you was like running on a cliff. I enjoyed the view and thought that maybe you could be my partner, but then the edge came and you were the one pushing me. You are an unfilled canteen, nothing but a thirst that will go unquenched. I lied to myself for too long because I chose to see the good in you, the good that wasn’t there. As I write this I shed a tear and I remember those daydreams. I remember thinking that you were going to be mine and that someday I would tell you everything.
Now you whistle and I do not hum along. How far we have come. Please just look the other way and let me sit here. Perhaps this silence will be good for me and maybe it will open your eyes. But I have to let go and I have to embrace silence. My heart is too fragile for this and my lips are tired of saying your name.

Blissful Confusion

You. I have a hard time writing about you. I haven’t noticed your walk and I haven’t categorized your laugh. Maybe this is because I haven’t had enough time, but maybe it is because you and I aren’t the same and he and I were.
I had time to take him in. I daydreamed for longer than I care to admit and that made every part of him a chapter to this movie I had been watching all along. I listened to him for a long time and he heard me in return. We joked and laughed and remained the same. You and I haven’t landed on that stone in the path yet.
Am I being guarded, my dear? If so I apologize. You see, you haven’t given me much to go off of. You say one thing and do not finish the other. You make me smile but after a while I rub my head out of confusion. Do you, or don’t you? Do I, or don’t I?
I try to keep him out of this but I can’t help but compare my heart’s notes. He and I made sense, but we never came to be. You and I make sense but will we ever come to be?
He looked at me, but he looked past me. After all, he had to. Will you though?
I can’t seem to make these ends meet. I’ve been sitting in this tree for so long, I don’t want to come down and face my problems at eye level. From this high up everything is right. I love the times when we are in a good place, but my confusion is overtaking them.
He confused me too.
Does that mean history is repeating itself?

Love Is Blind. And Invisible.

I tap my fingers on the cold surface of the table. This cafe is quiet. I realize I’m tapping my fingers to the beat of the song “Winter Winds”–I wonder why.
I see the door open through the reflection of the television that is painting a soap opera in front of me and my fingers stop. I know it’s you but I’m too nervous to turn around.
I bite the corner of my lower lip and smile. It is you. I can tell because I can smell you, that mixture of the night sky and deep woods. Just what I expected. I laugh under my breath and quickly fix my hair.
You walk closer but it seems like you are in slow motion. I watch you through the reflection once more but you are barely moving. What is happening? You finally reach me and I turn around. Your face? It’s blank, my love. I cannot see you and you are standing right in front of me. I reach out and touch you, the electricity between us is undeniable. You touch my hand and confirm my thoughts. You sit there, an almost invisible man. I know you are the one I have been waiting for, but you keep yourself from me. Why?


When We Try, We Are Champions

Joel 3:10 msg Let the weak one throw out his chest and say, “I’m tough, I’m a fighter.”

Sometimes I feel as though I have no power. It’s like I’m holding a stone, but I cannot come to throw it. I am in love, but I cannot find the words to express it. I feel weak. It’s like I am pushed down by the naysayers day after day. When I come to my feet they wind back their arm of hate and put me back into that place of helplessness. It’s like I have a hand over my mouth. Those who do not want the truth to be known try to keep me silent. They will continue one their wordless mission in hopes that I will give in and stop screaming under their deceitful hand.

I read the words above and do the same. I throw out my chest and say, “I’m tough, I’m a fighter.”

With this God-given confidence I am able to throw the stone across an ocean. I not only find words to tell of my love, I fall further in love that I could ever imagine. The naysayers come around the corner and see me in this new confidence. They turn and run out of intimidation, never to be seen again. And the liars who try to keep me from truth-shouting begin to lose to the words I proclaim. They too run and try to clean their filthy hand of the truth it is now covered in.

When we feel weak, this is when we have to try harder than ever. We have to put our fears away and really try. With a help from above, we can see that we are fighters. And beyond fighters, we are champions. Those who try to hold us back will not stand a chance when we do this.


On The Corner

I met the man of my dreams on the corner of Youth and Love.
We drew on the sidewalk with chalk all day and we held hands that night until they went numb.
I remember he caught my eye on the newly paved corner of Unexpected and Breathless.
My eyes didn’t blink.
I accidentally walked right into him on the uneven Corner of First and Embarrassed.
I had no clue what I was supposed to say.
We flirted on the grassy corner of Delight and Laughter.
He still had me smiling for hours even after he had gone.
Argument #1 happened on the humid corner of Misunderstanding and Immaturity.
We were so young, we had to learn how to calm each other.
He showed me how much he really cared on the comfortable corner of Genuine and Heartfelt.
He made my heart and soul dance to this song he had written.
We are older now, and we have learned so much.
That damn corner of Struggle and Pain really did us in.
But we were tough. We held one another when we cried and we made it through.
He dropped to one knee on the stunning corner of Forever and Ever.
I cried and laughed and screamed those three letters.
We became eternally each other’s on the perfect corner of Fairytale and Unending.
I can look at him still today and feel that same way.
I see the man I saw on the corner of Youth and Love.
And we will build a home here on the unmovable corner of Eternity and Captivated.
Joy is a understatment at best.


My Resolution

This year I will fall in love.

Now when I say this I don’t mean that I have to fall in love with my Mr. Right. I just have to fall in love with something.

Be it poetry,
or music,
or laughter.

This year I will fall in love.

I’ll leave all of my fears at the doorstep of 2013 and I will walk into the party that takes place inside. I will forget my past and begin to climb the stairs of this new year. I will hold close to my friends, my family and my faith.

Now, my Mr. Right, if you care to meet me this year, feel free to do so. I’d love to get to know you. We could laugh and sing and do handsprings.

This year I will fall in love.

I will fall in love with the beauty of Creation. I will fall in love with what I have become. I will fall in love with words, I will continue to write. I will never tell myself, “You can’t” and I will make myself try new things.

This year I will fall in love.



I just want to run. You make me want to forget but you beg me to remember. I want to clinch my jaw, tighten my fist and pound through these walls. I want to be away from here, please. You confuse me and I don’t want to put up with it anymore. Yes? No? Would you make up your mind? I’m lacing up my running shoes now. Stop me before I start. I tease you as I bend down to tie the first string, you laugh along and I think I hear you say, “Don’t do that,” but maybe it is all in my head. I loop the string and lay the other on top of it. Stop me, really. Running is the only way out of this. You smile and I remember that I shouldn’t have even put these running shoes on my feet. My feet belong here. Wait, wait, wait. You are changing your mind? Or is this how you’ve felt this whole time? Please, make a move. Do SOMETHING!No? Fine then, here we go. I tie the first shoe and move to the second. There may be murmuring in the background but I close my eyes tight and continue to tie. Both shoes are ready. They are tied in sad, yet secure knots. I’m running. Don’t try to stop me.
My knees bend and I lean forward, I’m going. My heart is yelling at my feet, “GO, GO!” but my feet remain here. Please, would you give a shove, I need to run but I cannot. I need you to do something. Either untie these shoes or push me forward. Your choice. But every moment you wait my heart sinks more and more.


Sense Doesn’t Make Any

Humans are perfect.

Do not shake your head quite yet, friend. Please, read on.

We are perfect when it comes to failing. We never get it right.

We are perfect when it comes to hurting those we love. We are selfish.

We are perfect at lying and breaking our word. We are tired of making an effort.

We are perfect at doing nothing at all. We believe things should come to us at our beckoning.

We are perfect when it comes to being blind. Again, we care far too much about ourselves.

Humans are flawed.

And now you are agreeing. You are one complicated person, my friend, but I’m right there with you.

We are flawed in the way we chose to love. We forget what love means.

We are flawed in the way we speak. We are ignorant.

We are flawed in our actions. We are impulsive and impatient.

We are flawed by those around us. We let them shape our individuality so that it matches theirs.

Being perfectly flawed in all of these things somehow makes us better. We cling to one another and suddenly all of our emotional wrinkles and sunspots fade away. We make each other ok. We learn to work against our perfectly flawed nature and we become great. We are not perfect by any means but we learn to love and this endeavor leads to perfect happiness.

Humans, how curious a creature…




The Corners of My Mouth

You see, my lips come together and form corners. They are a quiet part of me, and until now they always have been. They are lovely little corners but there seems to have been an occurrence: they have been stolen. Oddly enough, I no longer control them. You do. Whenever you are around these corners of my mouth rise and my lips play along.

I smile.

As you might have noticed, the corners of my mouth are shy. They hide every time I choose silence. They fear the harshness, like that of winter. They fear rejection and pain. Look at them, they are vulnerable and weak.  It takes some coaxing to get these corners to join in this song you’ve written but you seem to be an expert.

You come around and these corners respond at your commands. They rise and my lips play along.

I smile.

It is humorous how you are taking more and more of me. That is not a bad thing, in fact it is quite exciting. You stole my thoughts, my heart and now you own the corners of my mouth. You will in no time own my entirety and we will forever be together. These timid corners of my mouth are only the beginning of what you will leave your print on. And I cannot wait to see what our future will hold.